De-digitizing
Finding yourself with paper.
I have been dancing between the decision of going completely off-grid versus doubling down on consistently posting online and making something out of it for myself.
My uncertain emotions intensified around July, where I finally decided to bring most of my life, whatever is possible, to the offline world.
I was resenting using the Notes App, Notability, Notion, Docs, all my photos and videos only being accessible digitally, and I started to feel as if I own nothing, I am no one, and have no grasp on my life because it is all depending on a brick with a few wires.
You see, my phone has been acting up lately. Even though it’s a new phone, and I have gotten it repaired only through the manufacturer. Every time it became unusable, I realized how deeply dependent and shallow I have become.
Where did my passion for writing go? Wasn’t I the one in love with paper and notebooks? Where are all my little notes that tell me who I am? Where are the memories I captured in words? What happened to the girl who would sit with a pen and notebook for hours and hours a day?
So, I decided to de-digitize.
I transferred everything I had on those apps, or rather everything that mattered, onto paper.
I decided to bring onto paper everything that makes me, me.
Letting go of hoarding everything I see online. Physically putting aside the past versions of my beliefs and values. And connecting to myself through notebooks that bring me joy, filled with writings that tell my story and stay there for good.
And when I’m ready to move on? There will be another notebook waiting for me to fall in love with it and fill it up with who I am.
Grounding me, in the world around us.
So, I de-digitized. And I’m slowly working my way towards not needing a smartphone anymore.
Have you ever felt a similar tension with the digital world?!